Don’t Assume

I am a fertile myrtle. My mom has told me numerous times to be careful and take proper precautions against unwanted pregnancies.

However, things are starting to change as I grow older. I am in a committed relationship with a man I love dearly. Recently, I have noticed people becoming all too curious.

“When you move in with him…”

“When is he going to pop the questions?”

“You guys would have beautiful children.”

And so on…

I remember specifically when I was studying in London, my boyfriend and I took the train to Paris for a few days. We both had never been there and we were eager to travel together. My boyfriend mentioned to me how ladies at his work asked him if he was going to propose to me in front of the Eiffel Tower.

He laughed.

I didn’t.

I told him if he proposed, I would say no, and leave him in Paris. I wasn’t kidding either. Too harsh?

He playfully dropped to his knee only to tie his shoe, but winked at me before I swatted him on the arm.

We both have discussed that we are clearly not ready for that stage in our life. Unfortunately, people in our life are ready for that stage in our life.  And it is frustrating.

Which brings me to my point: do not, and I repeat, Do Not assume anything in regards to people’s future plans.

Let’s say your son is married to a wonderful woman. They are very happy. But then you begin to get antsy. It’s been a year, and they have not discussed plans for having children (that you know of). You start poking at the topic. Then you full on start asking questions, not able to control yourself.

“When are you going to give me grandkids?”

Because of your personal want, you make assumptions and create a very awkward situation.

What if your son’s bride explains to you that she cannot have children or doesn’t want to have children?

Awkward.

This same instance could apply to pushing marriage on someone.

If you continuously let what you deem to be the proper steps to take in life, or let what you want overshadow what someone else wants, and inflict those beliefs on them, say your son or daughter, you may start a fire you cannot contain. And it will burn you.

It is going to hurt when you assume things and they turn out to being quite literally simple assumptions and nothing more.

I always say keep an open mind. Your child is happy, correct? You want them to be happy, correct? Then stop getting your hopes up about things, assuming things that may not come true, to only get burned. Live now. Live today. The rest will come, or not. And that is okay! Happiness is key.

 

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